Today I thought more about Susan's words, "Be strong yet sensitive when you make your decisions...but above all, you must follow your heart....because living a life with a broken heart is no life to live". I find it very soothing. Why is it always so difficult for me to make decisions? Lu says to me, "Before you make the decision, think it through; what are the options, and choose the best option and stick to it." But for me, the qualities of the options change all the time, and consequently, I change my mind all the time. So mind is a very unreliable thing for people like me. What about my heart? Does my heart change all the time too? It seems one day I want this but the next I want something else? What is changing? My mind or my heart? This is a difficult question to answer, because when I am asking it, my mind is the one that evaluates the quality of my heart, and hence takes over. How can I listen to my heart without the interference of my mind? I am not sure. Right now I only know this, when my heart and my mind are not in accordance, my mind pushes but my heart feels it; when they do agree, everything becomes exciting and calm (see Gibran's lesson on Reason and Passion). So perhaps I should let the mind scan all possible options, and let the heart pick up the strongest signal. But, who am I?

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Reason and Passion, by Gibran

Your soul is oftentimes a battlefield, upon which your reason and your judgment wage war against passion and your appetite.

Would that I could be the peacemaker in your soul, that I might turn the discord and the rivalry of your elements into oneness and melody.

But how shall I, unless you yourselves be also the peacemakers, nay, the lovers of all your elements?

Your reason and your passion are the rudder and the sails of your seafaring soul.

If either your sails or our rudder be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas.

For reason, ruling alone, is a force confining; and passion, unattended, is a flame that burns to its own destruction.

Therefore let your soul exalt your reason to the height of passion; that it may sing;

And let it direct your passion with reason, that your passion may live through its own daily resurrection, and like the phoenix rise above its own ashes.

I would have you consider your judgment and your appetite even as you would two loved guests in your house.

Surely you would not honour one guest above the other; for he who is more mindful of one loses the love and the faith of both.

Among the hills, when you sit in the cool shade of the white poplars, sharing the peace and serenity of distant fields and meadows - then let your heart say in silence, 'God rests in reason.'

And when the storm comes, and the mighty wind shakes the forest, and thunder and lightning proclaim the majesty of the sky, - then let your heart say in awe, 'God moves in passion.'

And since you are a breath In God's sphere, and a leaf in God's forest, you too should rest in reason and move in passion.