edited e-mail excerpts:

It's true that my passion lies entirely in music, literature, metaphysics and such, and while I have strong analytical skills, I don't care much for that. If I get to discuss about math and science and technologies and anything that can be right or wrong, I have little patience and interest.

I hope one day soon we all know our true self and be content with our talents and strengths and make the best out of them.

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I do have a pretty high confidence level in my believes or otherwise I do not utter any words. This comes as a habit because I had grown up avoiding being "wrong". But then I do know that you can view me the same and opposite way, and I have already internally acknowledged that in my belief too (I think). You probably know me by now that I try to be this generalest generalist who can covers all grounds. I understand this can be frustrating to you or seem to be arrogant to others, but then this is how I am in my natural state and what I feel comfortable when interacting with others. It's really just about me and not about you or others. So, don't take anything personally! Remember laid-back!

Don't you feel one is vulnerable to criticism for bad writing in the same way that one can be wrong in science, or math? Sure you can say that you write for yourself, and care not what the public thinks, but then why look to others for tips on "good" writing? Isn't your heart the only judge of that?

I agree that one is vulnerable to criticism for bad writing but then it is more a matter of skills and tastes. In arts one can be good or bad, but not right or wrong. I care deeply what other think of my writing or my opinion of writings or arts many a time. This is why I feel especially close when I feel I can share my writing with someone and get criticism that encourages my own growth to become a "better" ah-san writer, not "better" to please the public but "better" to be me. OK, I might feel good about my writing writings but I sure don't feel good about my explanation writings, so if you don't know what I am saying here then it's just my bad....

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I feel bad about abandoning planetary science, but more and more I realize my passion lies elsewhere (not sure where). I like the idea of science but I don't like doing it personally on a daily basis. I am only afraid I would be bored with the new ventures I pick....