Why do we love temporary things? When all the teachings in the world tell us that the only true happiness is the eternal one bound by love of all (and such themes). What mechanism forces man to pursue short-term pleasures? Why do temporary pleasures exist at all? Great teachings tell us to abandon desire, to withdraw from wanting things, to go inwardly to find peace and contentment. But why do desires exist, and why are so many things outside ourselves?

OK, so Man is not perfect. We are unlucky to be human beings, because we have to go through the near-sightedness and narrow-mindedness and ignorance of a life. So maybe there isn't a "why" after all. Human beings are not created on purpose for experiments or illustrations or teachings of the God/Gods. Planet earth is purely accidental too. Or maybe not, for nothing is accidental. ALL things are created in the Universe and ALL that are possible exist, so we are just unlucky to be born as humans. We need to find our way back to the Origin. I wonder, is it easier for a flower to fulfill its purpose? It's simply a lot more complicated for us....

We are all just signs. We each is a sign that points toward what is inside of us--our maker, our creator, our true essence. What inside is surely not ourselves. We must come from somewhere: nature, the universe, and the soul of the universe. This is why we always feel an inkling to find out the meaning of the signs and to understand.

"Love is the only way to understanding." I want to say this, because it sounds good, but I don't know why it sounds good and be true. From the little bit of Augustine I learned today, I would say that love is what the free will does (whatever our will does, it does because of love--love of anything), but sometimes we love the wrong thing. When our love is in the wrong direction, we go further away from the Truth. Since everything external (money, physical body, knowledge, etc.) is not the essence, not Truth, not eternal, when we love those external things, we lose sight of the signs these external things point out for us. Therefore comes the teaching of detachment from external/temporary things--which include everything that is not the inner Self (or the whole, or God)--in order to reach contentment and harmony. It's not that we should not love anything, but we should realize the nature of our love. It's not that we should not "sin", but we should realize the consequence of our sin (sin here only means loving the wrong thing--anything other than the Self). The consequence is that we are unhappy.

Enough musing for now. I am only repeating myself, and I don't know where I am going. Now I must go and read some more.