chat conversation with F, about Masters.

master: I was just finishing a letter for you.
jorielle: wow, such a long letter. i should read first then.
master: It just answered your questions.
jorielle: questions.... so many of them all the time.
master: Human destiny.
jorielle: need balance.... need some time with no questions.
master: Indeed.
master: The past few days you took a rest, no?

jorielle: i guess i should never make any decision unless the decision chooses me.
master: I told you... You just need a good Master...
master: One who will make all the decisions for you, after having asked your opinion, though.
jorielle: really? but why do i have to listen to you???
master: You don't *have to*.
master: You just might *want to*.
master: If nothing else, because it would make life so much simpler for you.
jorielle: but why would i want life to be simple? shouldn't there be a balance between simplicity and complication?
master: Should it?
jorielle: i don't know...
jorielle: OK, i go to read your email and think about it.
master: See..
master: wouldn't it be easier if your Master was to decide all such things?
jorielle: but what about balance between easiness and difficulties? (lightness vs. heaviness)?
master: Easy: When you want life to be difficult, you just decide things on your own for a while...
jorielle: Oh!!! that sounds like a good plan.
master: I think the mere fact to have to will cure you of such desires pretty quickly.
jorielle: so, ok, now i go on my own and get myself married... later i will get a master to help me out of the mess.
master: That's an idea.
master: Albeit a slightly radical one.
jorielle: just to make it difficult for the master.
jorielle: so the master will feel more accomplished once he gets me out of the big mess.
master: Oh but nothing is difficult for the Master.
master: Remember, each time you make your own decisions, He could just tell you to continue to do so.
jorielle: will a master abandon the one being mastered?
master: Only if she decides to be on her own first.
master: Otherwise, very unlikely.
master: Masters have principles.
master: Well, each time you decide to dismiss the Master...
master: He could consider himself dismissed.
master: Otherwise, no Master worth the title would dismiss you.
jorielle: I see.. and then I can always get the Master back? or not?
master: Perhaps. All you can do is re-apply, and hope for the best.
jorielle: I see..... I see......
master: But as long as you don't change the rules, your position is quite self-perpetuating.
jorielle: what are the principles of Masters?
master: The rules they abide by.
jorielle: what rules?
master: Rules such as "The Master is always right".
jorielle: hmmm....
jorielle: but what is the hope for people like me, who always change my mind?
master: Honestly, it always appeared to me that it was what you needed most in your life: Directions.
jorielle: always.
master: You can make it a rule that it does not matter how you change your mind, you always obey the Master in all things.
jorielle: who make the rules? me and the Master together?
master: The initial rules, yes, of course.
master: It's a consensual pact.
master: But the rules can establish that the Master is always right...
master: or that you can't change your mind, except on Feb 29th.
master: Things like that.
jorielle: what do you mean by "change my mind"? about what?
master: About total obedience at all times
jorielle: I see.
jorielle: ouch! i see... i would say, MWF i can change my mind.
master: MWF?
jorielle: monday, wednesday, friday
master: Oh, well, I have a feeling you'd have a hard time finding a Master accepting such rules.
jorielle: Do all buddhist monks have Masters?
master: I think most do
master: or did
jorielle: where does one find a Master anyway? i would need a bunch to bargain from.
master: Well, when the chela is ready, the Master appears.
master: In your case, all you have to do is ask me.
jorielle: ask you to find me a Master? or ask you to be my Master?
master: Any of these two.
jorielle: Am I a very difficult case???
jorielle: Am I really too smart for my own good?
master: Only to some extent.
master: And no one can be *too* smart.
jorielle: i mean, maybe i will never learn how to harness myself.
master: On your own, that is quite a possibility.
master: And an additional reason why you need a Master...
jorielle: when will i feel absolutely i need a Master?
master: Haven't you already, if you *think of it*?
jorielle: not absolutely. only some of the time, i feel i absolutely... sometimes i feel i might...
master: Well, next time you feel it absolutely, just ask.
jorielle: yeah.. but then after a while i change my mind.
master: And create rules that disallow any change of heart before next February 29th.
jorielle: that would be 4 years from now!
jorielle: OK, since i am still asking you, it shows some affinity I have with the Master idea.
master: We both know that you do.
master: Yeah. Would give you some stability.
master: And if you are in a good day that day, even 8 years.
master: Or 12.
jorielle: i am still in the "consideration" period. still swinging. right?
master: I suppose...
master: Who can say, except you?
jorielle: OK. i don't know. i am too silly.
master: Another reason why you need a good Master.
jorielle: and i have a lot of other friends who are "normal", "different", or "jealous"...
master: yes. So?
master: (We know that
jorielle: ...... do you think you can make life easier for me?
master: That's pretty obvious, no?
jorielle: sometimes it seems life is getting harder now.
jorielle: sometimes it seems life shall never be easy.
master: Life on your own, indeed, will never be.
jorielle: ok, it is easier for me, because i get answers if i am stuck.
master: that's one of the advantages.
jorielle: how is your life? what is the difference between your life and my life?
master: I don't need answers.
jorielle: why don't you need answers?
master: Although I could need a harem of houris, and a billion or two.
master: But even *that* is just delusion.
master: But at least I know it.
jorielle: what stage are you in? and what stage am i in?
master: I am at the stage of *being* a Master. You aren't.
jorielle: once you are a Master, you don't need a super-Master?
master: Well, I don't think so. But then, I could be wrong.
jorielle: masters are all different, right? i saw the Madhu's book, talking about the difference among masters.
master: Yes, in a way.
master: But they are all Masters.
jorielle: I see.. i didn't read the book. just the beginning of the book.
master: These are just one type of Masters anyway.
jorielle: what do you mean? madhu's masters are all just one type of masters
jorielle: and there are many other types... you are a different type from all those 12 masters in his book?
master: well, no and yes
master: They are different. Are they all of one type? This could be the matter of debate.
master: Am I differnt? Sure. Some seem a lot more advanced. Some, perhaps less.
jorielle: I see.
jorielle: just one type, but different students see differently
jorielle: different students react differently with the one type?
master: That too.
jorielle: i see.. just the advancement.
master: Oh there must be more differences than that.
jorielle: when did you "graduate"?
master: I don't know.
master: I just know what I am now.
jorielle: personalities are all different.
master: That too.
master: But there must be essential differences as well.
jorielle: so, masters are all different... but they are all of one type, or of different types.
master: Different types too.
master: But don't ask a catalog of the types from me...
jorielle: why not???
master: I wouldn't really know, without giving it some thought.

jorielle: oh........ but a master is not always available.
master: A master would be if you lived at His feet...
jorielle: oh.. cannot have a remote master...
jorielle: you said you had masters from the past.... from books
jorielle: how can i get a master from books?
jorielle: then that way i can decide when to follow Him and when not to, quite easily.
master: Yes, that too. But you, you need a very physical one.
jorielle: why me? because i don't have discipline?
master: Simply because it is so.
jorielle: but i want to understand.
master: Yes, for example
master: Remember, all people are different.
master: Such are the rules that work for you.
master: And there is no doubt that you need a very physical Master.
jorielle: OK. i guess i will just have to wait until the urge is very strong.
jorielle: until then, i have to just run free, and suffer in the dark. something like that, right?
master: At least until you decide to ask.
jorielle: OK... sounds like a good plan.