5/6/2002 (Mon) 1:30pm, Eastern NW Chicago -> Minniapolis

Finished "Demian". Great book. Not really a "Youth novel" to me. Should not read as a novel. It's more a statement of Hesse, a record of his path, or itself is Demian, a master that helps the growth and self-realization of the other lonely seekers. Sindair has Demian,and we have the book. It tells us that we are not alone, although the path to oneself is difficult & lonely. In a chapter or two it seems every sentence is about me, is about the path that I have traveled on. It's an echo of my life. Maybe it is the way that every seeker walks. It is the same way for each of us, although each of us has to travel alone, and finds oneself.

The way.

I feel connected to the great minds of the world. I feel so priveledged to be among those with great minds and great passion.

I have broken out of the shell of the world and reborn again, (not now, but earlier), and I have found the path to find myself.

Maybe one day I will surpass Demian. I have noticed that toward the end of the book, our paths diverted. I have not applied the way to the worldly events -- the war & the politics, etc.

So will I be alone again? I am sure I will. At some point in the future, I will come to a path that I see no one has been. Then I have to struggle to find my own way. But I shall not be afraid.

One day I might write my own Demian, to record my own path, to be Demian to others who seek.

Being a seeker, I feel I am fulfilling my destiny, and realize all htat I am here to be. It is not the answer that matters. (And there might never be an answer to all these). It is the process of seeking that makes the journey destined to be taken. And I am to be a seeker and it is my role, my destiny, my self.