It's interesting that you realize that life is all about what we are going to do when we can't get what we want. That must be part of life. Another part, the part before the first one, is to find out what we want and figure out how to get them. I guess most people don't have as much trouble as me when trying to find what they want, so they just need to find a way to achieve their goal. Of course people should realize that nobody can get everything he wants. Then we need to deal with it. For me, there are two options: 1) change the goal; 2) change my attitude. In the past year, I have learned that most things are a matter of attitude. Our suffering comes from our own attitude. We need time to harmonize our attitude with pain. Next time we will be stronger, because our attitude can handle pains of that degree.

I think my philosophy is very Chinese, maybe closer to Taoism, although I don't really know much about either philosophy or Taoism. But for me, on one hand I try to achieve the harmonious state, to be "dan4 bo2" (mild), on the other hand I want to live an intense life and I want all the intensity of emotions. Maybe my goal is to harmonize the intensity and the mildness in life.

-- email excerpt to Rong